~*~ Thursday January 3rd. 11:07 pm
Parking lot of the Centurylink Arena, Boise Idaho ~*~

The look on Laura's face was absolutely fucking priceless.
I laughed all the way to my rented car.
But I hadn't even begun to extract my wrath on her "majesty". Oh no... I may have 'turned over a new leaf' but that didn't mean I wasn't pissed still about my knee.
It was almost completely back to normal but for liability sakes I had to wear this brace for a couple more weeks. Frankly I was just happy that I didn't need crutches anymore and I didn't need help getting to the loo.
Jax was gone again. Just as quickly as he'd re-appeared in my life he'd left but at least this time he'd said good bye. A smile spread across my face at the memory of our last night together. Oh yeah... a very nice goodbye. I couldn't say for sure if he would ever be back and I wasn't about to wait around either... didn't mean I didn't miss him though.
The apartment where he and Terrin had both stayed had been subleased out to some Armenian family. Terrin couldn't even look me in the face when he'd packed up. Didn't know if he would be back either.
Justin had gone home. Took a job with some uber big computer company. He wanted to spend more time with Bella and she wasn't willing to move to Vegas. And of course, Jerry was working with my Dad at the high school now.
I was finally on my own. No one telling me what I could or couldn't do... ahhh the quiet was nice but to be honest I had hoped that Jax would be back with me. He didn't share his future plans with me and I guess that's just the way he is.
I had rented a cute little Porsche at the recommendation of my physiotherapist... at least until the brace came off... he thought there was too much risk with my bike of re-injuring myself.
I was still sitting in the dark interior when my phone rang . It was Lucy.
Bliss: Hey
My Bluetooth kicked in and all I heard was a deep sigh come over the car speakers before she spoke
Lucy: It didn't look like that was easy tonight
I smirked. Lucy. Ever the worrier.
Bliss: Not the hardest problem I've had of late
I put the car in gear and pulled out onto the street. I think I would kind of miss this car. Dangerous talk for a woman with a bank account full of money.
Lucy: I know. You know... I was kind of... never mind...
Another smirk from me
Bliss: No... continue. No secrets right?
Lucy: Well...don't take this the wrong way but it was kind of arousing in a way... you know watching you out there... knowing I knew you...
I laughed.
Bliss: Its okay. Its a compliment. Especially from you Luce.
I knew she was probably blushing. She wasn't a lesbo at all. In fact she had a huge crush on a guy at her work. I had experimented a few years ago and actually had tried out a relationship with another woman. I wouldn't be opposed to one now... considering all the shit that MEN had put me through as of late
Lucy: Well ......
Yup. Blushing.
Bliss: So why else did you call?
Lucy: To congratulate you on keeping your cool. I know how easy it would have been to take out that woman and to be honest she would have deserved it. However it would have been detrimental to your recovery
Yeah. It would have been easy to take out Laura while she watched me in shock. It also would have been easy to have kicked her after Roxi had issued a little ' just desserts' but I didn't want to take the easy way out. The way my brothers always had, the way I had in the past.
Bliss: Thanks babe. I appreciate it
Lucy: What are sponsors for after all? You heading to your hotel?
Bliss: Yup. Back to my empty room but its nice that no family are involved with MPW any more.
Lucy: Justin especially since he is one of your triggers and an instigator to your rage. You will do just fine without him. Without terrin and that group you were in. They held you back anyway.
Bliss: I only feel bad for Nytrus but at least he wasn't the type to sit around with his thumb up his ass. That kid will go far I think.
There was quiet from the other end. Luce didn't know much about the world of wrestling so talking to her about it was often futile
Bliss: I don't think I've ever gone this long without some kind of male company in my life, excluding my brothers of course. It�s kind of lonely.
Lucy: No one said you couldn't start dating again.
Bliss: Yes well unfortunately the only man that I think is kinda hot is a little Looney Tunes and I also have this thing about sloppy seconds.... especially when its HER sloppy seconds....
Lucy: You know that Lexi is a trigger too. Forget about her. You don't NEED a man anyway. Especially one that talks to himself and actually listens....
Bliss: Right....
Lucy: Look why don't we Skype when you get to your room.. It�s still early. We can talk more . You sound like you could use a friend
What I needed was a way to release the tension in my shoulders causing me to grip the steering wheel way too tight. Unfortunately around here having a little fun with no strings made you no better than the dozen women I usually passed on the strip back home. Funny when a man did it his colleagues and friends congratulated him. When a woman did it you were labelled a slut.
Bliss: As much as I would love to see you Luce, I think I'm going to call it a night.
Lucy: Okay. but I'm there for you in a second if you need me
Bliss: I know you are. Get some sleep and I will text you tomorrow
Even though Lucy seems as if she knows I�m not fine she reluctantly hangs up just as I pull into a spot.
Back in Vegas my bike was parked horizontally across the top portion of my assigned parking spot, giving more than enough room for the car. I�d driven the rental out to Idaho. Of course stopping part way since 9 hours on a bum knee could really get to you.
With a sigh, I turned off the car...missing my bike and feeling like I was cheating on her with a slutty little black Porsche. I headed inside, giving the concierge clerk a nod in greeting.
Yeah I might not live in some mansion in LA and I may not have some douchebag cheating husband but I had my dignity and I had my pride. Both of which were worth more than selling myself for cheap parlour tricks like the Clashes seemed to do on a regular basis. They may be the head honchos right now but as with any cheap toy they'd break in an hour and be quickly replaced with some new novelty.

~*~ Sunday January 6th 2:38 PM Bliss� Apartment, Las Vegas ~*~

Tasha: You seem a little distracted... do you maybe want to reschedule?
I look up from my daydream and into the blue tired eyes of my interviewer. Seems I�m not the only one with things on her mind keeping her up at night.
This particular Daydream had been directly correlated to a recent twitter post from the fake messiah. Damn why did I always end up with the hots for the bad guy... well at least on most occasions... but I mean the last relationship the guy had turned out to be bad....
Tasha is still looking at me expectantly and I stumble on my words.
Bliss: Oh... sorry...I... no . I'm fine. I hate this shit so I'd rather just rip the Band-Aid off right now if you don't mind
Tasha shrugs
Tasha: I'm with you. I would like to do this now too
Bliss: Great
She gives me a half smile before motioning to the cameraman.
Tasha: Hello MPW universe. I have with me now the newly returned 'goddess', Bliss... welcome and might I say that I am not the only one that has been greatly anticipating your return
Bliss: Thanks Tasha. I'm sure you have been although I think there are a few that have wanted me to return for other reasons than yours
Tasha: By that you mean Laura?
Bliss: Laura... Drake.... Rage.... just to name a few.
Drake... damn that man had no business being in my thoughts... at all. He was bad news... arrogant as all get out and thought I wasn�t worth even shacking up with for one night, let alone more. Fuck me stupid.
Tasha: The fans are dying to know... why the change in character....I don't think anyone expected you to be so... calm...
I laughed. Calm? I guess so.
Bliss: Yes well I suppose I should let the proverbial cat out if the bag. I have been going to regular Anger management meetings. I even have a sponsor
Tasha looks a little shocked. Yeah that would probably shock a few people. Some might even accuse me of lying but they could follow me every Tuesday night to my meeting if they really wanted to.
...Hello, My name is Kahlan and I have an anger problem....
Tasha: Really?
I smirk at her.
...It all started when I was 17 and my brother beat the living shit out of my boyfriend...
Bliss: Yes. I�m still the same person just with a little more control and without a lot of the chains that were holding me back
Yeah... A big brother with a knack for finding out every single bad detail of almost every man I�ve decided to date, and also another man who tried to be my father. No thanks I already had a great one.
...Most of the time, It�s one of my brothers that sets off my anger...
Tasha: So what's going on with Roxi Johnson. Not only did you come out to help her last week but you were defending her on twitter as well
Bliss: Let me just start by saying that I have no doubt that Roxi can hold her own. She still wouldn't be tv champ if she couldn't. However when you go up against people like Laura it doesn't hurt to have a few allies in your back pocket. You never quite know what someone as conniving and deceitful as her is capable of
Tasha: Some would argue that you fit that description as well
Yeah. I still kind of was conniving and deceitful but I wasn�t lying about my stance on how I was going to win my belt back.
...being involved with wrestling has really helped but it�s also held me back a little too, You see recently there was this guy...
Bliss: Yes. In the past I was exactly like Laura, only way prettier, nothing fake and my ass fits in regular sized jeans. The difference between us now Tasha is not only those very obvious things but also that I've grown up. I know 6 weeks isn't really that long but it was long enough to realize my mistakes and start to learn from them
Tasha: You have a match against Laura on this weeks TNT and its a no DQ. What are your thoughts on that?
Bliss: Simple. Excited. I am going to enjoy making Laura pay for taking me out and almost causing me some permanent damage. I don't normally like using weapons because its not showcasing any real skills but I know exactly why Clash made this match... because its the only way his rancid slut of a wife has any hopes of winning a match. Which is fine. I don't need rules to teach that Benedict bitch a lesson.
Oh being able to release a little of that reserved anger on Miss Bitch Queen would feel soooo good. I�d been saving everything I had for the last 6 weeks. My actions on Thursday hadn�t even touched the surface.
...I tend to release myself in my work but sometimes my personal life tends to take a beating too...
Tasha: So you feel the odds are in your favour on Thursday?
Bliss: Let me put it this way, I'm expecting that this little red queen is going to use every trick imaginable to get a win on Thursday. It would bruise her ego too much to lose to me in my debut match back in MPW. So I wouldn't even be surprised to see Clash and his hired goons try and finish things for that no good talentless hag. She should have stayed in NYC. I won't let anybody get that kind of advantage over me again so of course that means I have to make some new friends too
Tasha raised an eyebrow. I cut her off before she can say anything
Bliss: All in good time of course. Not many people trust me so as the old adage goes... trust is earned not given
I had no idea how I was going to gain some allies in MPW. Most of them felt they couldn�t trust me as far as they could throw me, but I knew I had to start making them because there were too many dirty hands in the managerial honey pot and I was a pretty big bee around here when it came to title shot eligibility. Especially to Laura.
...I haven�t had a real relationship in nearly a year...
Tasha: So you let the world know about your future intentions..
Bliss: Yes. I want my Sin City title back. I didn't actually lose it to Rage. He did almost win it from me and I'm not afraid to admit that if there hadn't of been an interference in our last match he might have won... however he didn't and the only reason he does have it is because his opponents were way below him skill wise. The man is a legend. An asshole no doubt but still a legend.
Tasha: Drake Hunter has taken it upon himself to claim he is the rightful champ
Bliss: Pfft. So stealing a title makes you a champ? Geez if I had know that I would have used my feminine wiles to take the world belt a long time ago. Trey can deny all he wants...at Chicken�s Halloween party he was practically begging for me to come back to his place and be his slave princess.
Tasha frowns and bows her head. Had she been seduced by Trey as well? He wasn�t quite as bad as Clash and to be honest, I never have forgotten that kiss from months ago... despite the fact that he�s been a complete asshole, but only when I�ve been against him in some way. When our paths had crossed right before I�d left, he�d actually smiled at me... and then there was the party too. If I hadn�t of been with you know who, I might have actually fallen for it.
...I just want a normal relationship with a guy that actually wants a relationship too... without the stressors of getting married and starting a family...
Bliss: Drake has been listening to the gremlins in his head too long. Pretending all he likes that the Sin City belt belongs on his shoulder doesn't make it true... all it does is make him less credible as a wrestler. I mean he must be really afraid of Rage if he can't even get in a ring with him and actually WIN it from him. But I don�t fear Drake or his sidekick.
A slow smile spreads across my face, his worst comment so far besides saying that I don�t even measure up to his �skillz� was saying I was plastic. Fuck can�t a woman be endowed with a nice form without it being at the help of a surgeon�s knife?
...I always seem to find myself getting involved with guys from work and it ends badly, but I can�t help it. Other wrestlers get me better than a normal guy would...
Bliss: He really thinks calling me Barbie is an insult? I mean the woman has everything. Dream home, boat, Winnebago, a man that has been with her for like 60 plus years... not to mention the clothes, shoes and accessories. Plus she can do any job in the world she wants. I should be so lucky to be even a smidgen like her. I mean, all G.I. Joe had going for him was the muscles and fighting skills... not even a second outfit for dates.
Tasha smirks at my banter. With my control of my rage had I really gotten a little more funny?
Bliss: My point is this; Drake thinks he can find my button so easily but he�s never actually faced me solo before so he doesn't really have any idea what he�s truly up against. To be honest I just think he�s obsessed and in love with me. It�s so obvious, the man can�t stop mentioning me in promos or when he�s on the mic. It�s sad really... cuz he's got about a snowballs chance in hell of getting with this...
Tasha let�s out a short laugh, trying to hide it and failing when it sort of comes out like a snort.
I�m hiding my own smile. Didn�t they always say in grade school that when a boy hit you or teased you it was because he liked you... some small part of me actually was hoping that Drake Hunter liked me... sad...very damn sad and a little bit desperate.
...My new years resolution this year is to try and never use an elastic to control my outbursts of rage. I don�t want it to control me or my actions anymore...
Bliss: Once I get back my title then my plan is to win the rumble match at Army of One and secure a shot for the world title... whether it be Clash or Ash Soulsfate that hold it, doesn�t matter... I will beat either one. I�m not at all intimidated by the actor that tries to mimic a wrestler... every damn promo he has he�s putting on these little skits with his hoe bag girlfriend. I know my time will come with that little flat chested nobody is trying to pretend to be me... but no one can hold a candle to the real me.
I stop, taking a moment to clear my mind and not let the anger control me. Ha... who was I kidding. The Rage would always be a part of who I was but if I was the one in charge and not it, I may just be able to fool enough people to be believed that I was normal.
My fingers play along the scar on my wrist and I take a deep breath before continuing, calmer than I was a few seconds ago.
Bliss: I'm done messing around. I�m here to win... just... I want to win because I have the ability to not cuz I was handed shit or cheated. I got a taste of my own medicine recently and it was pretty bitter to be honest.
Tasha: Any last words before we go?
...Any last things you wanted to add before we wrap up?...
...yes, I�m not a slave to anger anymore. I won�t let the demon get that out of control again...
Bliss: Oh I have plenty of words but none will be the last. I'm here to climb to the top and I�m not backing down
Tasha smiles at me a few seconds before turning back to the camera
Tasha: Well there you have it. Straight from the goddess herself. I know I�m not the only one wishing her the best of luck on Thursday and when she gets in the ring at Army of One.
Bliss: Thanks Tasha
As everyone is wrapping up and preparing to leave my apartment Tasha comes up to me. She really does look like she needs a good rest. What the hell had she been doing since coming back to Vegas... or who had she been doing I should say.
Tasha: Did you really mean everything you said... I mean it�s almost a complete 180 from where you were before you left and I�ve heard you talk bullshit before
Bliss: I know you're not the only one with doubts. It�s understandable. I will prove to everyone that I�m the real deal
Tasha: Good. MPW needs that.
After she's long gone I'm still left pondering her words. Did MPW really need someone like me... unsure of themselves personally but confident on their skills as a wrestler. I guess my personal problems didn�t really have anything to do with my fight in the ring. The good guy pool seemed to be pretty shallow right now. Maybe I was what MPW needed right now.